Day 40 of the #40daysto40 #Birthdaychallenge Madness

Day 40: May 21, 2017, the day before my 40th birthday

Challenge: Tell Mom all about it

Part of the whole reason for this challenge is that I was feeling very lost in my life. My dear mother passed away just a few months before my 39th birthday, and in the year after she died, I tried so many different directions and had so many different things happen. I started a doctorate degree, but then decided that wasn't the right path for me. I got my first ever kidney stones - so painful - and had to have surgery. I had to have part of my parathyroid removed, and my voice changed forever. I was sad, and aimless, and falling into a well of despair. I had always had my mother to talk to, even after she became disabled. Even when I lived halfway around the world, even when I had to take care of her physical needs, even when I couldn't do it anymore and she had to go live in a nursing home, she was always there for me, giving me advice that only a mother could. I didn't know quite what to do without her advice, but I knew that if I continued on the path that I was traveling, I would end up next to her in the cemetery before very much longer. I needed something drastic to get me out of myself, to remind me that God is good and has a plan for me, to help me be brave enough to experience the world on my own. My sweet sister, Betsy, helped me design the challenge, and away we went. I learned so much about myself, and about the way I'd been treating myself. I just know that my mother is very proud of my accomplishments and my life. I wanted to tell her about how I'd changed, and what was happening in my life. I wanted to let her know that even though I still miss her fiercely every day I am finding ways to be happy.

I know that she is watching over me from Heaven, celebrating my triumphs and crying over my defeats. I know that she is pleading with the Father on my behalf. I know she misses me as much as I miss her. And I know that I'll see her again someday.

Tell Mom about life! #40daysto40 #birthdaychallenge #lastone! #birthdayistomorrow #Imissherfiercely pic.twitter.com/zpHxlDTTEL

— Stacy Mayren (@StacyLeeSnider) May 21, 2017

Day 39 of the #40daysto40 #Birthdaychallenge Madness

Day 39: May 20, 2017

Challenge: Go on a hike

This one was planned to be in Zion's canyon, but because of crowds, road blocks, and time we ended up just doing a tiny, 2-minute hike on a side road. Since we'd been all over in central and southern Utah the day before with our little road trip, we decided to let it count.

The reason that going on a hike was made part of the challenge was to remind me of God's creations. I love being outside, but when I'm home and comfortable, I forget that being in nature is invigorating to body, mind, and spirit. I wanted to ensure that as I was about to embark on a new decade of life that I gave myself a very good reminder that I need to spend more time in the great out doors. I still plan to stay inside most of the winter, but summer time is for hills and mountains, trees and flowers, sunrises and sunsets.

Do a hike! #40daysto40 #birthdaychallenge #Laverkinoverlook #shortbutstillcounts #roadtrip pic.twitter.com/RzGVXZbPFQ

— Stacy Mayren (@StacyLeeSnider) May 20, 2017

Day 38 of the #40daysto40 #Birthdaychallenge Madness

Day 38: May 19, 2017

Challenge: Go on a road trip

This challenge was just for fun. I have two very dear friends who have birthdays within days of mine, and we have celebrated together since our 13th birthday. For forty, we wanted to do something big, so we went on a little vacation/road trip together, just to have fun and reminisce, and enjoy ourselves generally. We stopped at a lot of places that I'd never been to before, and some that I had, we ate good food, and learned new things, and enjoyed the sights and warm weather (Kearns was unseasonably cold, and St. George was rather pleasant). This challenge also taught me that while it's good to remember the past, and hold onto important things, it's important to live in the present, and do things that bring you joy in the here and now.

Road trip! #40daysto40 #birthdaychallenge #stgeorgeherewecome #suchfun #27thbirthdaytogether pic.twitter.com/azAzeik3lf

— Stacy Mayren (@StacyLeeSnider) May 19, 2017

Day 37 of the #40daysto40 #Birthdaychallenge Madness

Day 37: May 18, 2017

Challenge: Take a family name to the temple

This was part two of the task to do some family history work. I found a name that I could take to the temple, and then I went to the temple to perform the saving ordinances for my ancestor. I will be the first to admit that I don't make it to the temple nearly as often as I would like to. I get tired, or busy, or just caught up in doing other things. But I need that connection to my Father in Heaven. I need that connection to my departed family. This challenge was a good reminder of the peace and strength that comes from spending time in the House of the Lord.

Take a family name to the temple! #40daysto40 #birthdaychallenge #suchfun #3daystogo #birthdayismonday

— Stacy Mayren (@StacyLeeSnider) May 19, 2017

Day 36 of the #40daysto40 #Birthdaychallenge Madness

Day 36: May 17, 2017

Challenge: Go to a paint night

I do not usually consider myself an artist, but that's because it doesn't come easily to me. I love making art, though, and feel that it's something I need to do more often. We humans are creative beings, we were made to create, and by doing so we can find joy in our own existence and in God's plan. Taking time out of our busy lives to make something beautiful is an essential, but oft forgotten, part of life. I hope that I have learned to make beautiful things more often.

Paint night! #40daysto40 #birthdaychallenge #thatpaintthing #Leatherbys #Iamnotanartist #Parisatnight #suchfun pic.twitter.com/qHIeE7JwhN

— Stacy Mayren (@StacyLeeSnider) May 18, 2017

Day 35 of the #40daysto40 #Birthdaychallenge Madness

Day 35: May 16, 2017

Challenge: Karaoke Bar

This was another task that was way outside my comfort zone. I love singing, and I love performing, but I get so nervous. I always have a good time, but I get so very nervous in the lead up time that I don't go sometimes, I don't follow through with my intent. This was a very good reminder that even though something seems very scary, I can do it.

Karaoke! #40daysto40 #birthdaychallenge #notmybestvoice #nottheworsteither #suchfun #latepostbecauseIjustgothome #1amramblings pic.twitter.com/kvvYLKxE27

— Stacy Mayren (@StacyLeeSnider) May 17, 2017

Day 34 of the #40daysto40 #Birthdaychallenge Madness

Day 34: May 15, 2017

Challenge: Do something good for the soul

As previously mentioned, music is a very significant part of my life. Sometimes when I'm feeling low, I forget that playing music is one of the fastest ways to connect my spirit to the earth around me, and my Heavenly Father, and lift me up again. I don't play nearly as often as I should, or even as I want to. Sometimes it makes me sad because I can't play like I used to, and I get angry with God for taking that away from me. Then I remember that if I'd continued studying and playing music, as was my plan, I never would have ended up as a teacher and met the amazing friends that I have now. His plan is good; it is truly the best plan. I don't always remember that, and I don't always want to trust in the plan when it hurts so badly, but His plan is good. Playing music reminds me of his goodness.

Do something good for the soul! #40daysto40 #birthdaychallenge #outofpractice #pianoneedstuning #anddusting pic.twitter.com/5jfHoYfuWI

— Stacy Mayren (@StacyLeeSnider) May 16, 2017

Day 33 of the #40daysto40 #Birthdaychallenge Madness

Day 33: May 14, 2017

Challenge: Get a tattoo

I didn't really get a tattoo, I did a henna tattoo that washed off after about two months. I love the idea of doing something that is more than slightly shocking or taboo in my little circle of family and friends. I feel that sometimes people see me in a certain light, or in a certain box, and it's good to break out every once in a while. However, seeing as how I get rashes and hives when I get ink on my skin, I was not comfortable with the idea of injecting ink into my skin. So, I went with henna. I chose a semi-colon with a heart because I've struggled with suicidal thoughts, and lost friends to suicide. I love the idea that no matter how bad things seem in the moment, I can choose to continue my story after the semi-colon.

Get a tattoo! #40daysto40 #birthdaychallenge #itisjusthenna #hennaisnoteasytouse #7daysleft #8daystotheparty pic.twitter.com/cNZves0KM0

— Stacy Mayren (@StacyLeeSnider) May 15, 2017

Day 32 of the #40daysto40 #Birthdaychallenge Madness

Day 32: May 13, 2017

Challenge: Participate in a 5K event

This one was super fun, because not only did I get to do another physical challenge to remind me of how amazing my body is, I got to participate in fundraising for the March of Dimes foundation. A co-worker of mine has an incredible daughter that was born prematurely, and that year (2017) her daughter was the Salt Lake spokesperson for the annual 5K event. It was nice to spend time with friends and do something good for others.

Participate in a 5K event! #40daysto40 #birthdaychallenge #marchforbabies #teamQuinners pic.twitter.com/y7pRczNGW6

— Stacy Mayren (@StacyLeeSnider) May 13, 2017

Day 31 of the #40daysto40 #Birthdaychallenge Madness

Day 31: May 12, 2017

Challenge: Attend a sporting event

I don't often go to sporting events, they're expensive and not many of the people I know enjoy the same ones that I do. So, for this task, I decided that I would go to a sporting event that I enjoy, and I would invite my family to participate. I took my nephews to their very first baseball game - The Salt Lake Bees. I thought it was very fun, and my oldest nephew, at least, enjoyed the game. The other nephews got a little bored once the novelty of being in a new place wore off. Again, it was an important reminder that I need to do things that bring me joy, and spend time with my family more often.

Go to a sporting event! #40daysto40 #birthdaychallenge #nephewsfirstgame #suchfun pic.twitter.com/q4ebRdM9cR

— Stacy Mayren (@StacyLeeSnider) May 13, 2017

Day 30 of the #40daysto40 #Birthdaychallenge Madness

Day 30: May 11, 2017

Challenge: Do an at-home facial

This was another challenge to do something I'd never done before, pamper myself, and remind myself that I am pretty and worth doing nice things for. 

I often find myself doing nice, or expensive, or time-consuming things for people that I love, or even people that I just like, but then I refuse to do those things for me because in the back of my mind I think that I'm not worth it. But I am, I really am. I have value that is just as great as anyone else on this planet, and I deserve to do nice things for me just because. 

Try an at home facial! #40daysto40 #birthdaychallenge #blackseaweedlavender #picturewouldbeinappropriate

— Stacy Mayren (@StacyLeeSnider) May 12, 2017

Day 29 of the #40daysto40 #Birthdaychallenge Madness

Day 29: May 10, 2017

Challenge: Leave a surprise for a stranger

Talking to new people has always stressed me out; I don't like it the least little bit. But I feel that the world needs more kindness, and the word of a stranger can change a life. So, I did something that was way outside of my comfort zone, and I handed this note to someone I'd never met before, and probably never will again.

Leave a surprise for a stranger! #40daysto40 #birthdaychallenge #surprisemotivation #youareawesome #sharethelove pic.twitter.com/aQyggRnN7s

— Stacy Mayren (@StacyLeeSnider) May 11, 2017

Day 28 of the #40daysto40 #Birthdaychallenge Madness

Day 28: May 9, 2017

Challenge: Give a music lesson

Anyone who knows me well knows that music is huge part of my life. I love to sing, and dance, and play music whenever I can. These same people who know me well can also attest that teaching is a huge part of my life. When I lost the dream of becoming a professional musician, I fell into teaching, and I love it. It is challenging and rewarding, and consistently changing; teaching has become my life. It stands to reason, then, that I would want to share my passion for music with others through my gifts of teaching. Over the years I've taught various types of music lessons: piano, voice, theory, choir. But I've never made it a consistent part of my teaching. I set this challenge for myself kind of on accident, my nephew needed help with his violin so I put my other 40 days to 40 tasks on hold and drove to Syracuse to see what I could do to inspire him. 

While I was teaching him what I know about the violin, and practicing an instrument, it reminded me that music really is a huge part of my life, and though I'm a teacher first these days, I am a musician at heart. I was able to get a music teaching position in the school district that I work with. It's been challenging, but it's been very good to have music back in my life on a more consistent basis. It has inspired me to pursue a secondary music endorsement and license so that I can teach in the junior high and high schools; as it turns out I'm not very good with the smaller children in elementary schools. I'm very glad that this task came into my life at this point, so that I would have the opportunity to reflect on how it will make my soul happier.

Give a music lesson! #40daysto40 #birthdaychallenge #mynephewsarethecutest #violinpractice pic.twitter.com/JuWVZVdiym

— Stacy Mayren (@StacyLeeSnider) May 10, 2017

Day 27 of the #40daysto40 #Birthdaychallenge Madness

Day 27: May 8, 2017

Challenge: Go to a Zumba class

This may seem like the same challenge as a few days ago, but in my brain it was extremely different. The dance class was with people and in an environment that I was completely comfortable with, the Zumba class was with total strangers in a public gym! A lot of the tasks for this challenge were physical tasks. As I'm sure I've mentioned before, that's because I needed to remind myself that I have an amazing body that is strong and beautiful, and also I need to be doing more things to take care of my body. These physical challenges also pushed me mentally and emotionally. They helped me to remember that I can do hard things if I put my mind to it. They helped me remember that people aren't nearly as judgy as I fear they are. And they helped me remember that when I do something physical I feel better mentally.

Zumba was very fun, but it was also very nerve-wracking for me. If I ever attend a class again, I will not be going alone. I will, however, be doing more of this type of exercise in my very private living room.

Go to a Zumba class! #40daysto40 #birthdaychallenge #KOPFC #suchfun #mylegswillhurttomorrow

— Stacy Mayren (@StacyLeeSnider) May 9, 2017

Day 26 of the #40daysto40 #Birthdaychallenge Madness

Day 26: May 7, 2017

Challenge: do some family history work

Family history work has always been a challenge for me: it's hard, it's boring, and it's hard. A lot of work on both sides of my family has already been done by over-zealous relatives through the years. There are duplicate records, and false records, and missing records, it's a big, ugly mess that doesn't make any sense to me, no matter how hard I try to figure it out. I've been to the Family History Library down town Salt Lake City, I've talked to family history experts, I've scoured over microfilm and microfiche, I've really tried. However, as I was preparing to embark on this crazy 40 days to 40 challenge, I read through my patriarchal blessing and was reminded of the admonition to seek out my kindred dead. So, naturally, I set one of my forty tasks as doing some family history work.

After about two minutes, I realized/remembered that my family lines are screwy and hard to work with, and someone else is always doing work on them. This means that whenever I log in, all I have to do is click on the temple link, and like magic there are names I can take to the temple. Two minutes for a challenge that's supposed to improve my life is kind of cheaty, though, so I looked for something else to do. I decided to do a batch of indexing. Indexing is also kind of hard, but it's really interesting work. I read through and transcribed some Revolutionary War muster rolls. It felt good to be doing my little part to preserve records for not only my church, but my country. It reminded me of all the men and women who've sacrificed to protect my freedoms. And, most importantly, it inspired me to continue to serve in this manner. I don't do it often, under the premise that I keep myself fairly busy, but I try to do at least one batch of indexing every month. If you're reading this, I highly recommend to you that you take advantage of this service opportunity.

Do some family history work! #40daysto40 #birthdaychallenge #indexingisfun #RevolutionaryWarMusterRolls #Iwilldothisoneagain

— Stacy Mayren (@StacyLeeSnider) May 8, 2017

Day 25 of the #40daysto40 #Birthdaychallenge Madness

Day 25: May 6, 2017

Challenge: Attend a dance class

This was another challenge to push me out of my comfort zone. I love dancing, and I'm pretty good at it for someone of my vastness. However, I don't really enjoy dancing in front of others because I'm terrified of what they'll think of all my bits jiggling around. A community theatre that I have participated with over the last few years was having some cheap classes, though, with people and instructors that I knew, so I decided it would be a good place to start. I went, I danced, and I didn't care what anyone thought of me. And that's the lesson that I have been trying to learn for practically my whole life: it doesn't matter what someone else thinks! I need to be be brave enough to live joyfully. I need to do the things that make me feel good about my body. My body is amazing! Sure, we've had our ups and downs, but my body has never completely failed me. It gets me where I need to go, and helps me do the things that I need to do. It is strong and powerful, and (dare I say it?) beautiful.

Dancing is good for the soul. Even if I only do it in the privacy of my own living room, I promise myself that I will dance more!

Attend a dance class! #40daysto40 #birthdaychallenge #getyourwiggleon #2017attheEmpress #AlexanderHamilton #hiphop #suchfun

— Stacy Mayren (@StacyLeeSnider) May 6, 2017

Day 24 of the #40daysto40 #Birthdaychallenge Madness

Day 24: May 5th, 2017

Challenge: Get a pedicure

This challenge may seem silly to many people, but I think it's important to remember to not only take time to do nice things for yourself, but do things that remind you that you are pretty. I've been told by a lot of people that I am ugly. I have internalized that feeling, that heart-achy feeling, of being rejected by people who were supposed to love and accept me. I bury it deep in the back of my mind trying to forget, but every time someone makes a disparaging comment about my appearance, it comes roaring to forefront of my thoughts and sends my emotions on an out-of-control roller coaster ride. I have learned that I need to be grounded in my own truth about my own self so that others' opinions don't knock me off course. Little things, like pedicures, remind me that I am pretty. Maybe not in ways that others want me to be, but that doesn't matter. I am pretty, and I am worth paying to get pretty feet every once in a while, so that when I look down in the sadness that comes when someone calls me ugly, I have a little reminder that they don't know my truth, and their opinion is none of my concern.

Get a pedicure! #40daysto40 #birthdaychallenge #sisinailsalon pic.twitter.com/sS4eZBBvkw

— Stacy Mayren (@StacyLeeSnider) May 6, 2017